Get Your Popcorn Ready...

No, this isn't about T.O.

There are few things in life that put me in a awful mood worse than seeing a bad movie. You spend two hours in the theatre wondering what else is playing down the hall and how you can justify spending eight bucks on this entertainment (Matinee show). I am the person that doesn’t even want to admit he saw that bad movie or even talk about it afterwords…(Not that I did this whole move thing today....ugh).

I sat through The Informant today envisioning how this whole movie happened and what these writers/producers/actors saw in this film. I even asked my buddy Will what category it fell under…it wasn’t funny, action packed, scary or drama filled. Anyway, I wanted Oceans 11 and got Gigli…wanted Star Wars IV-VI and got Star Wars I-III…I want my eight bucks back…

Just as the entertainment was missing in this Matt Damon masterpiece, the defenses were missing in the sport of football this weekend. I felt as if I was watching one of those crossfire shows featuring Bill O’Reilly and Chris Matthews where everyone is throwing out offensive accusations but no one is defending their beliefs. As a Georgia fan, I could talk all day and until my face is red and black (get it?) about how bad our defensive scheme is and how Willie Martinez needs to be shipped not only out of Athens, but out of the state and country while you are at it.

Why is Mark Richt so nice? Why is he consistently backing Willie Martinez even though all of Bulldognation is against him? Why can’t I fold A-6 suited every once in a while? It’s the same question as parking on driveways and driving on parkways…meaning we live in a world that doesn’t make sense and I don’t have the answers. If I had the answers, Willie Mart would be gone, Mark Richt would be angry, I would hit a flush on the flop, and the whole automotive situation would be solved as well (Not sure how…).

Finally, I would like to give a shout out to Tony Gonzalez (Hi Tony!) for being the weapon that will propel the Falcons to greatness. I have been at the Dome the last two Sundays (Thanks Toby and Johnny Sr.) and have watched the Dirty Birds flex their wings (Does that fit there?) Anyway, watch out NFC South. OK, I’ll hang up and listen…(Off to buy a Tony Gonzalez jersey…throwback style).

Where Do I Begin?

Alright, I have finally had it! I cannot sit by and let this go on for another day. I have way too much information, knowledge (is that different?), facts, rants, and good/bad jokes in my head to not start filling everyone in on what goes on in the mind of John Penland.

Thanks to my former employer (leave of absence…not firing), a few extra seconds during the day, and the numerous amount of repetitive sports writers and talking heads on television for making my blood boil to the level of spilling my guts all over the world wide web.

Not to say that I don’t think there are good writers, radio hosts, and television analysts out there. I personally love Bill Simmons, Peter Gammons, Collin Cowherd, and Tony Kornheiser…along with numerous Sportceneter anchors….Scott Van “Melt” (Anyone seen that commercial?) and Steve Levy (Can I get confirmation, maybe a W2, that he still works at ESPN?). But for every Dan Patrick out there is a Skip Bayless and Jesse Palmer and I as a sportsfan cannot stand listening to these guys butcher everything under the sun.

Remember the old saying “Every 15 seconds a baby dies?” well it should be “Every 15 seconds, Skip Bayless is hating on someone else…” It is insane! And don’t forget about former Florida Gator legend Jesse Palmer (whom I am ashamed to have the same initials as) who cannot take his eyes off the cue cards to at least pretend to show emotion on the tube. I mean, don’t get me wrong, they are probably both nice guys (except for SB), I just don’t need my sports info from them.

And one more thing! I know, like I said before, that I am a stay at home single dad of no children at the moment, but come on…how many times do I need to hear that the Jacksonville Jaguars GM is thinking about drafting Tim freaking Tebow next year so he can boost ticket sales. Goodness, every show should have one story so everything isn’t beat into the ground by the time Pardon the Interruption and Around the Horn come on. On a side note, they should remove NFL football from Jacksonville for having an owner who thinks this way and a stadium that is full once a year (Cocktail Party???).

Ok, now you know whom I like and whom I don’t. Let’s get down to business. I will not be commenting on any NHL topics, not because I don’t care, its just…well yes, I do not care! The NFL and College Football season is upon us (Christmas?!?) and my beloved Georgia Bulldogs already have a loss (We haven’t had cocktails yet!)….

Alright, well I will talk about this more tomorrow, I just had to wet your appetite, stick your toe in the water, you get the point…